Uncharted territory: experts discuss the future of intimacy in the digital age
How do dating apps, AI companions and online communities shape the way people connect, feel desire and build intimacy today? These were the questions explored at Digital Futures of Desire, a Valentine’s-themed online event hosted by the Digital Futures Institute.
Top row (L-R): Professor Kate Devlin, Dr Rikke Amundsen. Bottom row: Samuel Douek, Dr Chloé Locatelli
Bringing together experts from academia and the creative industries, the discussion examined how technology already mediates love, longing and connection, and what that might mean for the future.
Opening the event, Professor Kate Devlin framed the conversation around everyday experiences of intimacy that many people recognise. ‘Each of these moments, moments of desire, connection, longing, arousal, or even heartbreak, was mediated by technology, screens, algorithms, platforms and data. And this isn't a distant future, it's already here, and it's how many of us live now.’
Dr Chloé Locatelli, Lecturer in Digital Media and Culture, shared insights from her research into intimacy and emerging technologies. Speaking about relationships with digital characters and AI companions, she challenged common assumptions about what intimacy looks like.
I think there is a misconception that people engaging with characters are strange or bizarre for doing so, and that ultimately we should exclusively prioritise human-human relationships. Whenever that idea comes up, I invite people to think about the ways they’ve had strong feelings towards characters around other forms of media – whether it be a film, a book, or a parasocial relationship with a celebrity that you have a crush on.
Dr Chloé Locatelli, Lecturer in Digital Media and Culture
While people’s strong ties to fictional beings are nothing new, what has changed today, according to Dr Locatelli, is 'an unprecedented level of interactivity that emulates human intimacy.'
Dr Rikke Amundsen, Lecturer in Digital Media and Culture, focused on how people use smartphones, social media and messaging to build romantic and sexual relationships, and how this affects trust and consent.
With intimate practices that are digitally mediated, temporal or contextual elements to them get stretched. Time and space operate differently. It is very unusual for the data that we produce when we are being intimate to completely disappear. It would usually be in some tech provider’s archive, or in your bin, or there will be some sort of footprint somewhere. It is also easier for it to move around. Affordances are there for these things to move in and out of private and public contexts very easily, and that enhances risk.
Dr Rikke Amundsen, Lecturer in Digital Media and Culture
With enhanced awareness of intimate vulnerability and risk, we will see an enhanced focus on trust, says Dr Amundsen.
Offering an industry perspective, filmmaker and entrepreneur Samuel Douek reflected on how digital platforms have transformed queer communities and sexual wellness brands. Samuel pointed out how technology is being utilised ‘to enhance or make more convenient historic practices of desire that have been around for millennia.’
I have always had a hawk’s eye on queer subculture, how it manifests and evolves in different forms. What’s been really interesting to see is how it's adopted technology as a tool to further build community, to further access people who are typically out of reach.
Samuel Douek, Founder & CEO of HOWL
Looking ahead, the panel shared hopeful and cautious visions of the future of intimacy. While technology may become more deeply embedded in daily life, the speakers agreed that human connection remains central.
The recording of the Digital Futures of Desire is available here.
