More than sharing space: building a home in shared accommodation

Hi! I’m Christie, a postgraduate student studying MA Cultural and Creative Industries. Are you thinking about moving into a shared accommodation, or feeling a little nervous about living with new people? I got you!

I still remember how nervous I felt on my first day in London, meeting my two flatmates for the first time. Now a year has passed and they have become some of my closest friends at King’s and we have built a warm and welcoming home together. Of course, like any relationship, shared living came with a few bumps along the way. So here are some things I learned about creating a ‘home away from home’ with your flatmates.

You’ll be surprised how everyone has their own different routines, habits, cleaning standards or ideas of what ‘quiet’ means. No need to feel overwhelmed.

The key is transparent communication. It helps to have the slightly awkward conversations early, before small things become bigger problems. You can talk about cleaning rotations, how to divide shelves and kitchen space, when to take out the bins, how to communicate about guests, and when people need quiet time.

In my flat, we spent our first week getting shared plates, cutlery, cleaning products and everyday supplies like toilet paper. Once we had agreed what was shared, it became much easier to talk about restocking and sharing expenses.

Of course, nothing goes perfectly as planned. Sometimes life gets busy, routines slip, and the rules that worked in September may not work anymore by December. That doesn't mean that you failed at shared living. It simply means you need to adjust.

If something isn't working, instead of letting frustration build up, try to address it calmly and suggest an alternative. In turn, if you flatmate raises a concern, try to be an active listener. Shared living isn't just about defending your own needs, but also making space for others. Sometimes, it isn't even about changing the rules. It is about being understanding.

During busy assessment periods, my flatmates and I would sometimes help each other out without making a big deal out of it. For instance, when the other seems overwhelmed, we would put their forgotten dishes in the dishwasher or take the bins out instead of them. Keeping an open mind can be just as important as open communication.

Living together doesn't automatically mean you will become close friends or feel like a family. And that is perfectly fine. A good shared home starts with respect, kindness, boundaries, and small moments of connection.

Saying ‘hi’ in the kitchen can turn into asking about each other’s day. That can turn into longer conversations, shared dinners or night outs. The more you open up to the relationship, the more your home can extend beyond your bedroom and into the whole flat.

One of my fondest memories with my flatmates was our ‘Monday Fundays’. On Mondays, we would cook or get take-out and watch our favorite films together. As coursework became busier, we couldn't keep it going forever, but it helped us grow closer and made our flat feel more like home.

Personally, living in a King’s Residence really made it easier for me to meet people and settle in. I lived in Urbanest City with other King’s postgraduate students, and many of my closest friendships started at the Welcome Party of the day I moved in.

If you are living in a King’s Residence, keep an eye out for opportunities such as Resi Life social events, Resi Sports and Wellness programmes, and support from the Residence Wellbeing Team. These are wonderful ways to meet people in the same building and to ask for help when you need it.

Co-living can take time to get used to, and it’s completely fine to feel a bit awkward at first. But with honest communication, small acts of care, a willingness to understand each other, and a step out of your comfort zone, it can become one of the most meaningful experiences of student life. You aren't just sharing a space, but learning how to build a home together.

For more inspiration, read the latest edition of Live Well, Feel Great, packed with practical wellbeing tips and ideas to help you start the new academic year feeling healthy, happy, and ready for what's ahead.